M

(1945--)

U.S. comedian

Comedy is the art of making people laugh without making them puke.

(1945--)

U.S. comedian

I believe that sex is the most wonderful and beautiful thing that money can buy.

(1945--)

U.S. comedian

I think I did pretty well, considering I started out with nothing but a bunch of blank paper.

(1945--)

U.S. comedianactor

I gave my cat a bath the other day. He just sat there. Actually, I think he enjoyed it. It wasn't very fun for me, though. The fur kind of stuck to my tongue.

(1945--)

U.S. comedian

Writing about art is like dancing about architecture.

Did you ever walk into a room and forget why you walked in? I think that is how dogs spend their lives.

(1866—1934), writer

Be yourself is about the worst advice you can give to some people.

(1875—1955), German novelist

There are times and countries when the only place for an honest man is in jail.

(1875—1955), German novelist

War is only a cowardly escape from the problems of peace.

(1854—1925)

U.S. Vice-President

I'm from Indiana, the home of more first-rate second-class men than any other state in the union.