T

(1854), "Economy"

Beware of all enterprises that require new clothes.

Life is something that everyone should try at least once.

May the enemies of Ireland never eat bread nor drink whisky, but be tormented with itching without benefit of scratching.

(1894--), Life (March 14, 1960)

I used to wake up at 4 AM and start sneezing, sometimes for five hours. I tried to find out what sort of allergy I had but finally came to the conclusion that it must be an allergy to consciousness.

(1894--), Life (March 14, 1960)

Let the meek inherit the earth--they have it coming to them.

(1894--), Observer, 1 July 1956

Ashes to ashes and clay to clay, if the enemy don't get you your own folks may.

(1894—1961)

U.S. humorist

Seeing is deceiving. It's eating that's believing.

(1894—1961)

U.S. humorist

A woman's place is in the wrong.

(1894—1961)

U.S. humorist

All men kill the thing they hate, too, unless, of course, it kills them first.

(1894—1961)

U.S. humorist

Early to rise and early to bed makes a male healthy and wealthy and dead.