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search one's heart
search one's heart или search one's soul {v. phr.}, {formal}
Анализировать чьи-л. мотивы и действия; пытаться понять был ли кто-л. или поступок справедлив и честен.
The teacher searched his heart trying to decide if he had been unfair in failing Tom.
- heart-searching или soul-searching {n.} or {adj.}
After much heart-searching, Jean told Beth she was sorry for the unkind things she had said.
The minister preached a soul-searching sermon about the thoughtless ways people hurt each other.
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Источник: A Dictionary of American Idioms